Job Description

🛑🍕💜 URGENT BULLETIN: UNIDENTIFIED FLYING RACCOONS HAVE TAKEN OVER NEW HAVEN. THEY DEMAND SUBMISSIONS. 💜🍕🛑

New Haven, Connecticut… we have an operational vacancy, and the secret committee of highly opinionated urban raccoons running our tech support has officially lost their minds. 🦝📋

They’ve rearranged the filing cabinets.

They’ve turned the shredder into a nest.

They’ve unanimously declared: WE ONLY WANT THE CHOSEN ONE. 😭😂

💜🎉 NOW HIRING: 1-ON-1 BEHAVIOR TECHNICIAN / ABA PARA! 🎉💜

📍 NEW HAVEN, CT

💰 $25–$30 PER HOUR!

🧩 UPGRADE YOUR WORKDAY FROM SOUL-CRUSHING TO TRULY AMAZING!

🧪 THE RACCOON-APPROVED VIBE CHECK

Do not hit apply unless you can survive this deeply unscientific screening:

🧦 Can you handle it when a session completely goes off-script and stays fun anyway?

🎨 Can you invent a high-stakes scavenger hunt using nothing but three sticky notes and a toy car? 🏎️

🏆 Do you react to a kiddo mastering a tricky life skill like you just won a mega-jackpot? 🎰

🦆 Can you tap into your inner child for a laugh while remaining responsible and precise?

💜 Do you actually care about helping an autistic child explore their world with pure joy?

If you checked those boxes…

CONGRATULATIONS. THE CRITTERS HAVE VALIDATED YOUR APPLICATION. 🦝✅

🎮 YOUR NEW MISSION: LEVELING UP 1-ON-1

You aren't going to be sitting under fluorescent lights typing emails that start with "Per my last message..." 🤖❌ Instead, you'll work one-on-one with a wonderful child, converting therapeutic targets into everyday victories:

🧩 Building communication milestones during an epic backyard safari.

🎲 Navigating board games where the actual goal is learning how to share without a meltdown.

🎨 Becoming a legendary supplier of high-fives, positive reinforcement, and encouragement.

🌟 Catching those small, beautiful moments of progress that change everything for a family.

THIS IS NOT A DESK JOB. IT’S CLINICAL PROGRESS, HIDDEN INSIDE PLAYTIME. 🥹💜

💸 THE PART THAT MAKES YOUR CASH APP SYNC UP

💰 $25–$30 PER HOUR!

Your checking account just did a backflip. Your local food truck budget has entered an era of luxury. 🍕📈

⏰ FLEXIBLE SHIFTS

After-school, evening, and weekend slots built to slide seamlessly around your university classes, your first job, or your existential dread.

🎓 MASSIVE RESUME GLOW-UP

Studying Psychology, Special Ed, Speech Therapy, or Pre-Med? This hands-on clinical data collection is pure gold on a graduate school application. 🌟

🤝 ZERO EXPERIENCE REQUIRED

We don't expect you to arrive with a master's degree in human behavior. NO RBT CERTIFICATION REQUIRED TO APPLY! If you are kind, reliable, and ready to learn, our BCBAs will handle the rest (and yes, we pay you for training!).

🦸 THE SPECS: HUMAN EDITION

✅ You possess genuine, deep empathy for children.

✅ You understand that big breakthroughs take time and lots of repetition.

✅ You show up exactly when you say you’re going to show up. No ghosting.

✅ You bring warm, infectious, positive energy into a room.

🚨 BONUS POINTS IF YOU CAN ACCURATELY SING THE CHORUS OF "LET IT GO" WHILE BALANCING A PLASTIC CONE ON YOUR HEAD.

Please do not drop the cone. HR has enough paperwork. 😭🍦

📣 NEW HAVEN, THIS IS YOUR EXIT RAMP FROM THE GRIND.

A job paying $25–$30/hour, top-tier clinical training, real human impact, and zero requirement to wear a suit or pretend to love spreadsheets. 🙅‍♂️❌

💜 NOW HIRING: BEHAVIOR TECHNICIAN / ABA PARA

📍 New Haven, Connecticut

💸 $25–$30 per hour

🎓 RBT certification not required to start!

📞 INTERESTED? SLIDE INTO OUR INBOX OR DROP A LINE RIGHT NOW!